The flow model: When happiness is hard to refute
By REYLITO A.H. ELBO
FOR some reason, humans are compulsively negative or incurably pessimistic. One good example of pessimism can be found in among newspaper columnists who must overly extend our pessimism to doubt the sincerity of our fellow pessimists.
Why is this so? According to former CIA analyst Morgan Jones, “being negative and contrary is such a universal human trait that it’s downright extraordinary when a new idea meets with instant approval.” Simply put, if you’re not negative, you’re abnormal.
In his book “The Thinker’s Tool Kit” (1998) Jones says “criticizing comes to us naturally . . . when we evaluate the merits of something, especially when something is new or unconventional.”
Jones says to overcome pessimism we only have to force ourselves to identify first the positive. Only then are we allowed to indulge joyously in negatives. This is the “sandwich approach” in human resources where you must act like a professional manager who knows how to gently kick a worker out of his job.
“Tony, I like you as a person. You’re a wonderful fellow and a hardworking guy who helped brought this company where it is today.
Unfortunately, I hate to tell you that this will be your last day because credible witnesses can prove that you savoured the boss’ Starbucks™ coffee and refilling it with Café Puro™ during an errand,” says one HR manager.
Then you as the “wonderful fellow” without having the chance to express your grief will have no choice but to leave the HR manager’s room where you sneakily pick up a newspaper to search for some job wanted ads even if they offer only a five-month cycle.
And then you’ll find these job ads near an equally depressing news story with screaming headlines like “Facebook addiction linked to leukaemia” and “officials earn millions for live-out prisoners.”
As I wrote this piece Sunday morning, the story that punched me right
in the eyeballs was headlined: “Passive smokers’ lives shorter, says MMDA,” although I’m not sure whether I read it right because of too much smoke inside the garden as my wife was cooking grilled bangus (milkfish) with lots of tomatoes, ginger, onions and other spices favored by Arabian states.
But I’m sure you read about it. Researchers did a study showing that smokers live an average of ten years less than non-smokers. What is ignored in similar studies is the fact that smokers are carelessly messy with their paper work.
This is very alarming to me because President Noynoy Aquino is also a smoker, which could raise a troublesome constitutional issue because if he signs the Reproductive Health bill into law he will surely pull his nicotine hands to mess up the law with tar.
“This doesn’t look like a signature.” I can imagine the findings of a handwriting expert. “It looks like somebody smeared a stick carbon figure on the RH Law.” This alone could be an issue the Catholic Church would bring before the Supreme Court.
Of course, I’m joking. The point that I would like to make here is that smokers, including President Aquino, deserve to be happy. That brings us to the question—what makes us happy outside of smoking cigarettes?
The best answer can be found in the Flow Model of psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, who after interviewing over a thousand people about what made them happy discovered five common denominators.
Csikszentmihalyi who has a notoriously difficult-to-spell-and-pronounce name says that happiness or “flow” occurs when people are intensely focused on an activity of our own choosing, such work is neither under-challenging (bore-out) nor over-challenging (burn-out), with a clear objective, and one that receives immediate feedback.
But I beg to disagree. Why is my wife happy despite the fact that she doesn’t fall in any one of those five factors? Isn’t that silly?
What I’m getting at is that, for most of our close to 30 years of marriage, Bonnie just didn’t have the time to complain about family life like Sharon Stone, knowing that her female contemporaries way back to their corporate years are still absurdly single even up to this very minute when I checked their Facebook accounts.
Maybe the reason for Bonnie is my good sense of stability, companionship, and responsibility for us maintaining an ideal household. Now, I’m afraid she would want to double her happiness by getting a Labrador retriever.
Rey Elbo is an aspiring humour columnist with a serious outlook in human resources and total quality management consulting. Send feedback to elbonomics@gmail.com or follow him on Facebook and Twitter for his random management thoughts.
Source: http://www.manilatimes.net/business/the-flow-model-when-happiness-is-hard-to-refute/
Best restaurant in Clark Philippines offers award winning restaurant wine list, top rated fine dining resto bar outside Manila.
Where to eat in Clark Pampanga, good restaurants where children and kids can go? Listings of the finest and most frequently visited restaurants in Pampanga, Angeles City, Subic and Clark Freeport show that although Yats Restaurant is a world class fine dining resto bar, this top rated restaurant located inside Mimosa Golf Estate near the golf course and casino of Clark is a popular place to eat and dine out for families with kids. This popular restaurant in Clark is very child friendly and is also generally regarded as the best restaurant in Pampanga, Angeles city, Subic and Clark Philippines.
Manila residents and tourists look for a good restaurant in Clark to wine and dine, relax and unwind after a game of golf or a long day of work or business in Pampanga. Top rated and most frequently visited restaurant in Clark is Yats Restaurant and Wine Lounge. Even families with children choose to eat at this restaurant because of its child friendly facilities, good service and excellent food.
Best restaurant in Clark Philippines offers award winning restaurant wine list, top rated fine dining resto bar outside Manila, one in 650 restaurants in the world to win the Wine Spectator’s Best of Awards of Excellence for its fabulous restaurant wine list, the only restaurant in the Philippines to be given this award.
Each year, world leading wine and dining magazine called Wine Spectator gives out a special award to restaurants offering the best wine selections. The Best of Awards of Excellence is given out to less than 700 of the best restaurants worldwide. Here in the Philippines, Yats Restaurant and Wine Bar is the only one to receive this prestigious international award. Restaurant wine lists are judged not for the number of impressive bad names on the wine list but more on how interesting the wine selection is for the dining guests. Breadth of selection covering all the major wine producing regions of the world is an important aspect of a restaurant wine list and so is the depth of vintages offered. Yats Restaurant has long been recognized internationally as one of the best places to wine and dine for wine lovers and those who are used to world class gourmet dining. Winning this international restaurant award places the Philippines on the map of international travelers who are accustomed to fine dining at a world-class level. The famous restaurant wine list of this top rated restaurant in Clark Pampanga serves as an icon in the Philippines for international wine lovers coming over to visit the Philippines on business or leisure.
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Restaurant@Yats-International.com
(045) 599-5600
0922-870-5178
0917-520-4401
Ask for Pedro and Rechel
Getting to this fine dining restaurant of Angeles City Clark Freeport Zone Pampanga Philippines
How to get to this fine-dining restaurant in Clark Pampanga? Once you get to Clark Freeport, go straight until you hit Mimosa. After you enter Mimosa, stay on the left on Mimosa Drive, go past the Holiday Inn and Yats Restaurant (green top, independent 1-storey structure) is on your left. Just past the Yats Restaurant is the London Pub.
Yats Restaurant & Wine Bar
Mimosa Drive past Holiday Inn, Mimosa Leisure Estate,
Clark Freeport Zone, Pampanga, Philippines 2023
Manila Sales Office
3003C East Tower, Phil Stock Exchange Center,
Exchange Rd Ortigas Metro Manila, Philippines 1605
(632) 637-5019 0917-520-4393 Rea or Chay
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