Go Forward with a Family Retreat

April 20, 2011

By Wayne Rivers

Family business owners dream that their businesses and their families will be stronger together than either would be by themselves. This dream will never become reality without time invested in both the company and the family. A family retreat is a great way to invest time and effort in strengthening family ties, developing better communications, and resolving issues.

All too often day-to-day demands of the business are so consuming that thoughts of a family retreat might seem idyllic but impractical. To others, thoughts of a family retreat invoke fears of time away from the job, great expense and potential conflict. With few exceptions, however, families testify to the wonderful experience and closer bonds that result from time away together. Most families look forward to this yearly event and enjoy the planning process. They boldly pronounce it’s well worth the effort. It is incredible that two or three days can have such a positive effect on both the family and the business.

A recent real-life example can provide testimony to the benefits of a family retreat. The family was typical. Dad started the business almost 30 years ago. Mom hadn’t worked in the business. Three sons all worked inside the business in different capacities. Their spouses were not involved in the business except for what they heard from their husbands.

Admittedly, some of the tales were good and some were not. The normal sibling rivalries existed, along with some other family issues which were generally ignored.

A normal concern about potential problems dominated the initial discussions about the retreat. After some planning the decision was made to go forward. The parents expressed some reservations even as the members assembled for the first session together. Fears were soon dispelled as the ice melted and everyone settled in for a magical time together. The time away had been so special that everyone hated to leave. They vowed to strengthen their efforts to work together better, understand each other more and concentrate on better communications with each other. Most importantly, they saw how much family meant to each of them, and they openly expressed a desire to be closer and more loving. This family, like most others to take advantage of a family retreat, came home refreshed and already looking forward to next year’s event.

The question of who should attend is easily answered. Every member of the family needs to be involved in these memorable events. There will be times when adults will need child care for younger members, but there will also be plenty of occasions for all to enjoy the retreat. Virtually all facilities have access to child care and rooms in which children can enjoy activities appropriate for their ages.

It is generally recommended that the retreat be held off-site, away from the daily routines, telephones and beepers. To do otherwise might rob everyone of the full benefits gained from time together. Location doesn’t have to be a drawback. The Southeast U.S. has plenty of sites which can accommodate small or large family retreats. North Carolina is blessed with plenty of venues in each of the geographic areas of the state. Perhaps you might choose Pinehurst one year, the coast another and the mountains a third year. The local Chamber of Commerce can often give you names of good places to meet, but facilities aren’t hard to find. The main consideration for a location is that it have lodging, rooms large enough for meetings, child care accommodations, and a restaurant. It is best that travel be kept to a minimum during the retreat and it is convenient if meals and meetings can be close to one another.

Let’s address the matter of costs since many family business owners have already started adding up the expense of a retreat. While there are costs associated with taking your family away for several days, you can plan with a budget in mind. Meals don’t have to be lavishly catered. It isn’t required that accommodations be five star or even held in a resort area. You can achieve the results you want with careful advance planning without having to mortgage the business. Most families agree that the costs are minimal compared to the improved relations and harmony in the family.

Typically, a family retreat will span three days. The first day is devoted to getting checked in, getting familiar with the facilities and having free time. The second and third days will contain more structure. It is recommended that the retreat consist of one-third structured educational activities, one-third structured family activities and one-third free time. There are many specific exercises which can make the time more meaningful. A few of them include:

• Personality profile testing and explaining personality types
• Outlining the history of the business and lessons learned through the years
• Explanation of family estate planning
• Forming a Family Council
• Personal effectiveness training
• Developing a statement of family values
• Understanding the basics of financial statements
• Future vision for the family business
• Team building exercises

Obviously, the exact agenda for your family’s retreat needs to be carefully considered and structured to meet your needs. Good advance planning pays big dividends at the event.

Generally it is best to have the retreat facilitated by one or more outsiders. Not only are these facilitators more experienced in such events, they can relieve family members of the responsibility of worrying about conducting activities. This frees up all the family to enjoy and learn from the retreat. The Family Business Institute can help you plan, organize and facilitate a retreat for your family. If you want more information please call us at (877)326-2493.

Climbing the ladder of success is wonderful, especially if your family comes along with you. A family retreat can help nurture and strengthen relations between family members that will pay huge dividends, both in the family and in the business. ■

Source: http://www.familybusinessinstitute.com/index.php/volume-3-articles/go-forward-with-a-family-retreat.html

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